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Witty Sarcastic Quotes "I'm definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it." "I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?" "Jealously is a disease…get well soon!!!" "That is the ugliest top I've ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly." "Think I am sarcastic? Watch me pretend to care!"
Top 40 Funny Witty Quotes Daily Funny Quotes
1. "Adulthood is like losing your mom in the grocery store for the rest of your life." 2. "Hahahahah" 3. "I am fluent in three languages… English, Sarcasm, and profanity." 4. "Zombies eat brains. You're safe." 5. "If my jokes offend you: 1. I'm sorry 2. It won't happen again 3. 1 &2 are both lies 4. You're a fool." 6.
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The Best Funny Sarcastic Quotes And Sarcasm Sayings. Said by Oscar Wilde to be the highest form of intelligence but the lowest form of wit, the word sarcasm comes from the Greek and Latin for "to tear flesh". But, new research by Harvard, has found that sarcasm's bite is mostly benign. Start with the best good Funny Sarcastic Quotes!
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Savage Sarcastic Quotes. 1. "I'd explain it to you, but I don't have crayons and a blank piece of paper with me right now.". 2 "You consistently set low expectations for yourself and still fail to meet them.". 3. "I've met some pricks in my time, but you, sir, are a cactus.". 4.
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Neither one works. ~ Will Rogers. This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic. ~ Lorrie Moore. The consumer isn't a moron; she is your wife. ~ David Ogilvy. Martyrdom: The only way a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw.
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Like perfectly timed funny quotes, a sarcastic comment can put someone rude in their place or help you make a self-deprecating joke (think: tripping over your shoelace and saying "Smooth.
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funny sarcastic quotes Sarcasm: the witty will have fun, but the stupid won't get it. - Unknown Revenge is beneath me. But Accidents Happen. - Unknown I'm 97% sure you don't like me. But I'm 100% sure I don't care. - Unknown sarcasm quotes If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ. - Unknown Witty Sarcastic Quotes
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Funny Witty Quotes Sarcastic Quotes 1. "I'm sick of following my dreams, man. I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with 'em later."—Mitch Hedberg 2. "Life is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That's one of my mottos."—Stanley Hudson, The Office 3.
32 Sarcastic Quotes, Witty Quotes, Or Just Funny Quotes Sarcastic
Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People. "Oh, please, keep telling me about your endless authenticity while you change your personality like outfits.". "Fake people should come with a warning label: 'Contents may include traces of sincerity.'". "Congratulations, you're a master of disguise. I almost didn't recognize your real self.
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1. "When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark." 2. "I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life .".
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"Action will destroy your procrastination." - Og Mandino funny witty quotes "Arguing with a fool proves there are two." - Doris M. Smith "Better a witty fool than a foolish wit." - William Shakespeare witty sarcastic quotes "Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs." - Oliver Goldsmith short witty quotes "Down to earth, but still above you."
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"If you want to call a family meeting - turn off the WiFi and sit in the room where it is located." - Anonymous. "Knowing your family so well that you can make out who's coming by the sound of their footsteps." - Anonymous. "In general my children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television." - Erma Bombeck.
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"Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell." - Joan Crawford "Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it." - Gene Perret "I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury." - Groucho Marx
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"You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed." "Be careful when you follow the masses. Sometimes the M is silent." "If you want to change the world, do it while you're single. Once you're married you can't even change the TV Channel." "Mirrors can't talk, lucky for you they can't laugh either."
It always happens to me funnyquotesforteens in 2020 Sarcastic quotes
Sarcasm Sayings. "I don't keep secrets; I just keep people out of my business." ~ Anonymous. "Cancel my subscription because I don't need your issues." ~ Anonymous. "I clapped because it's finished, not because I like it." ~ Anonymous. "If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I'll be poor." ~ Anonymous.
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3. "No, you don't have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time." - Anonymous 4. "My level of sarcasm has gotten to a point where I don't even know if I am kidding anymore." - Anonymous 5. "If karma doesn't hit you, I gladly will." 6.
